WOW... It's been a while!

o1. What Color Is Your Toothbrush? I use a Sonicare.. gotta love my healthy gums :)
o2. Name One Person That Made You Smile Today: My cousin Kaedin.. He called me and told me he misses his "Wimsey Macole"- Lindsey Nicole :)
o3. What Were You Doing At 8 Am This Morning? Hacking up a lung.. gotta love the FLU :(
o4. What Were You Doing 45 Minutes Ago? Eating dinner, really early!
o5. What Is Your Favorite Candy? Mounds Bars!!
o6. What's Your Favorite Food? Filets!!!
o7. What's the last thing you said out loud? "is that a midget?!?"- I was watching Oprah.
o8. What Is The Best Ice Cream Flavor? Mint Chocolate Chip from Graeter's
o9.What is the last thing you drank? Sunkist-- I know..Bad..
10. What Is The Longest You Have Gone Without Sleeping? Like 26 hours- Relay for Life
11. Have You Ever Made a Promise You'd Die to Keep? Die- probably not..
12. The Last Sporting Event You Watched? Tennis
13. What Is Your Favorite Flavor Of Popcorn? Kettle Corn
14. Ever go camping? It's been forever!!!!
15. Do You Take Vitamins Daily? Yes
16. Do You Go To Church Every Sunday? Not EVERY Sunday
17. Do You Drink Your Soda With A Straw? If it is from a Fast Food place...
18. What Did Your Last Text Message say? A healthy baby! I don't even care what it is, Just Healthy!!- My friend, she's PREGGOOOOO!
19. Where Is Your Dad? Probably driving home from work?
20. Look To Your Left, What Do you see? One of my couch pillows falling over.
21. What Color Is Your Watch? It is silver, with little diamonds. It is a Fossil from my hubby on our wedding day. I love it!
22. What did you do yesterday? Found out I have the flu. Went and got my medicine, slept, slept, coughed ALOT, and slept some more. :)
23. Do You Go In At A Fast Food Place Or Just Hit The Drive Thru? Depends on how busy it is.
24. What Is Your Favorite Number? Hmmm I don't really have one?
25. Who's The Last Person You Talked To On The Phone? My mom. She was checking in on me and my sick hubby.
26. Any Plans Today? Nope we are not allowed out of our home! This H1N1 stuff is NO JOKE!
27. Biggest Annoyance In Your Life Right Now? My surgery that is planned for next month. :(
28. Last Song Listened To? I have no idea!
29. Can You Say The Alphabet Backwards? Nope!
30. Favorite Pair Of Shoes You Wear All The Time? Depends on what season it is. I love my black pumps or any of my flats!
31. Do You Love Anyone? :0) Yes!
32. What Do You Usually Do During The Day? Work. Come home and cook dinner, then hang out with the hubby!
33. Do You Hate Anyone That You Know Right Now? Hate is a VERY strong word. I do dislike people though!
34. Do You Use The Word 'hello' Daily? Yep
35. Do You Like Cats? I love my Murphy Boy. I am definately a CAT person!
36. Have You Ever Been To Six Flags? Yep- Cleveland
37. How Did You Get Your Worst Scar? I was jumping on my parents bed and fell off and bumped my head! :) Had to get a lot of stitches in my eyelid!
38.. Last CD Played? Ummmm, a burnt one in my car, but usually I just use the iPod hook up.
39. Last Bubble Bath? Last night! I'm sick!!
40. Last Meal?Matt and I just made our favorite homemade pizza's, with olive oil, fresh mozzarella and basil!
41. Have You Ever Dated Someone Twice? The man I married!
42.. Have You Ever Lost Someone? Yes- :( It's been a rough year.
43. Have You Ever Slept Until 1pm? Only when I am sick!
44. Have You Met A Famous Person? Ummm... Not that I recall!
45. List Three People You Can Tell Pretty Much Anything: My mom, My aunt and My Hubby.
46. List Five Favorite Colors/shades: Black, Grey, Tiffany Blue, Pink and Yellow.
47. Whats your favorite TV show? 24, LOST & Biggest Loser
48.Favorite Books? My Sister's Keeper, The Plain Truth and Twilight
49.How many sibling do you have? 3 Sister's and 1 Brother
50.How many babies do you want to have? I want 3, Hubby wants 2!

CRAZY weekend & NEW JOB!! Yay!!

SO, I know it is almost Friday again... but I needed to update with new pictures and a little on my life...

So we had a CRAZYYYY weekend... But it was SO much fun!

Friday night we went out and saw my brother's band play.. THEY ROCK... they have really been getting busy around here!! They have gigs every weekend.. SO we went out and saw them.. We didn't stay out too late because I had a busy day ahead of me! But here is a pic from going out.. I am on the left, my brother's girlfriend Courtney is in the center, and my favorite aunt "Weezie" is on the right.. and we accidentally cut our friend Abbey out... Ooops!!!!

Then SATURDAY... wow what a day... So I had a Bridal Shower to go to..it was a very pretty shower.. I forgot my camera, so no pics for that...

Then I had a Graduation Party..my best friend, Anna, from high school, well her brother Nick graduated.. so that was cool...

THEN!!! We had the Bachelorette Party!! It was awesome.. We went to Shadowbox Cabaret, which is like a comedy skit club.. then we just went out to one bar afterwards... But we had a DD and had a really good time!! Here are some shots from that!... Okay SO I had a little too much to drink... BUT we were all on our best behavior! :)

And then on Sunday my littlest sister GRADUATED from William V. Fisher Catholic High School!!!!! I am SO proud of her!! She is my little big sister, as I call her. :) I love her so much and can't wait to see where God takes her down the crazy road of life... CONGRATS ALL 2009 GRADUATES!! Here are some shots from that!

OH & the greatest news yet... I GOT A NEW JOB! I START MONDAY, JUNE 22!!! YAY!! My workplace now is just not where I want to be at all... I am just happy that hard work and perseverance pays off!! Not to mention it is going to be better pay...and 2 miles from my house!! Woop Woop!

So now this coming up weekend we have her Graduation Party... I have been busy all week getting stuff done for her party, so I am sure at some point next week I will upload with pictures from that...

This one is for my baby sister :)

I hope that days come easy and moments pass slow,

And each road leads you where you want to go,

And if you're faced with a choice,

and you have to choose,

I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.

And if one door opens to another door closed,

I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,

If it's cold outside,

show the world the warmth of your smile,

More then anything,

more then anything,

My wish, for you,

is that this life becomes all that you want it to,

your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,

You never need to carry more then you can hold,

And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,

I hope you know somebody loves you,

and wants the same things too,

Yeah, this, is my wish.

I hope you never look back,

but ya never forget,

All the ones who love you,

in the place you left,

I hope you always forgive,

and you never regret,

And you help somebody every chance you get,

Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,

And you always give more then you take.

Oh More then anything,

Yeah, and more then anything,

My wish, for you,

Is that this life becomes all that you want it to,

Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,

You never need to carry more then you can hold,

And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,

I hope you know somebody loves you,

and wants the same things too,

Yeah, this, is my wish.

Reading a good book!

So I am reading an amazing book... It is about a man who has been diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer, and about his last lecture he will ever give, and how he has to leave a legacy for his three young children so they remember their dad...If your in need of a good book, I HIGHLY recommend it :)

One month ago today...

So we went to the cabin again this weekend. We just needed it. My parents and our cousins went with us.. It was awesome..

It has been hard. Today is exactly a month since I went into the hospital and got the saddest news of my ENTIRE life. It seems like it was just yesterday. It has made today super hard. I can't help but think I should be THAT much closer to seeing my baby. I mean in a way I am that much closer, because I will eventually see it in heaven.. but I should have been 1 month closer to having him or her in my arms. I miss it. I miss the feeling of just knowing I was providing a safe haven for a perfect little being. It's so hard. Noone understands except the people who have gone through something like this, and forever I will be grateful to everyone who has helped me through everything.

So I had a follow up appointment on Friday. Dr. Parker is an amazing doctor. He is just so great not only as a Doctor but just as a human being too. He definately knows how to comfort people in these times of need. So I went in for another internal U/S. As of today it has officially been 4 weeks since I had the shots of methotrexate, so on Friday just a couple days short of 4 weeks... Anyways, the mass in my fallopian tube, which was my baby, has increased in size. I also now have a mass in my uterus which he thinks is just blood. CRAZY. He seemed kind of dumbfounded by it. My HCG levels are now in the 300's, so he says that they are decreasing perfectly and there is no reason to be concerned. He actually doesn't want to see me for an U/S until August 28th.. Kind of scares me since the mass grew, but I know he is an awesome doctor so I should just trust his opinion. In the meantime, he said if I have any excruciating pain at all I need to go to the hospital... STAT... He also said that we should wait 3-6 months to try again.. which made me sad because I was thinking we already had a month behind us.. Who knows.. Matt and I have decided that we are going to be careful but come August no matter what it is baby making time :)

Well I am going to cut this short...I have tons more to talk about but I am just kind of sad so I will update later! xoxox

"God won't make a mountain I can't climb..."- Not sure who wrote this, but I like it :)

Another good weekend!

It started off by having an AWESOME wedding to attend.. My good friend Mandie from high school got married! Her wedding was gorgeous.. and so was she!! It was so nice to be with good friends and it was so amazing the way her NEW hubby looked at her as he was saying his vows.. It brought tears to my eyes... he was just saying them and was COMPLETELY in love with her..Here are some pictures from their beautiful wedding!

After the wedding we went straight home, packed and were out at Matt's parents cabin by 5 pm.. It was a GREAT getaway.. It was just so awesome to be away from all the responsibilities of normal everyday life! We just relaxed, sat around the fire and hung out with family. I actually had my pain spell come back for the weekend, which stunk, but it wasn't something that my meds didn't control! BECAUSE I was so relaxed, I only took 1 picture... It is the picture of my husband.. with ORANGE gloves on, doing the dishes!! He is too funny, and then the other ones are a couple months old, but this cabin is just the best place ever!










Then on Monday we went swimming all day with family!

AND AT LAST.... My AMAZING garden!!! Look at all the green!! My tomato plant isn't doing GREAT, but my green beans are!!



This Memorial Day weekend was just SO nice. It was a great feeling to just FORGET everything.. I can say forget, but I didn't at all..but I was just reminded of HOW AMAZING the people and surroundings in my life are! And it is making this JOURNEY, that much better!

And my Quote:

" You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover's arms can only come later when you're sure they won't laugh if you trip."Jonathan Carroll

Get AWAY weekend!!!

Ahhh. I feel SO fortunate, we are going away for the weekend to my husband's parent's cabin! They will be there too but it will be such a nice getaway from everything we have been going through!! They own 8 acres and it is in the middle of NOWHERE... the stars are amazing, and we have 3-4 wheelers we take with us...we plan on going fishing (I haven't gone in years!).. we usually get out there at LEAST every 6 weeks.. it will be a nice long weekend.. the last time we were there is when we conceived..SO BYE FRIENDS!! Have a GREAT Memorial Day!! I will upload with pictures when I get back!

:( Sad Day Yesterday

So...I asked Matt to HIDE all baby stuff! The day before finding out I was having an ectopic pregnancy I had my first Dr.'s appointment, they gave me a folder of pregnancy stuff, I scheduled my U/S appointment, then I went to Target to get some cute stuff because I was SO excited!!

So, I am cleaning YESTERDAY.. of ALL DAYS!! And then BAM- right in my face falls out an appointment card... saying I have SHOULD have had an appointment at 2:40... Not only just an appointment, but my ultrasound...

Talk about being devastated AGAIN... It brought back every emotion.. I was sobbing... I'm not mad at Matt at all, he did do very well at hiding it all.. so since I blog, I decided I wanted to take some pictures of it all.. Because that is my emotional therapy, pictures and colors.. lol.. and boy do they make cute baby stuff these days!!.. At least next time we get preggers I will have some special stuff for our baby!

Just thought I would share..

"Lost love is still love. It takes a different form, that’s all. You can’t see their smile or bring them food or tousle their hair or move them around a dance floor. But when those senses weaken, another heightens. Memory. Memory becomes your partner. You nuture it. You hold it. You dance with it." -Mitch Albom